We live in a right-handed world.

There’s no doubt about it, we righties have it easier. Just try going to the left side of life. I did so recently out of necessity when I broke my elbow.

The right one, of course.

In addition to the inconvenience of being limited to one useful arm (I’m not even supposed to brush my teeth with my right hand), here are some particularly right-handed assumptions the world makes:

• Doors almost always favor a right arm. How can that be when they go both directions, in and out. Trust me on this, making the switch takes some thought.
• Drivers have a right-hand advantage. Try clicking on your seatbelt and setting the gears in motion only with your left hand. I’m sure lefties get used to it since they most likely are better at using both hands than I am at this point.
• Recliners. Where is the hand mechanism to lift the leg rest? Right. You guessed it. I’ve spent a few hours sitting and sleeping in mine, only to have people walk away assuming I can get in and out. “Um, family, come rescue me. I’m trapped in a recliner!”
• I hate to bring up bathrooms. But, it’s a very real discrimination against left-handed people to hang the toilet paper on the right. Almost all public bathrooms do, and a good number of homes have it on that side, too. Never mind the choice between over and under. It’s a moot point when you can’t reach it in the first place.

I do understand that my leftie life would be a lot easier and less exhausting if I had use of both hands. But that experiment wouldn’t work since there’s no way I would be able to prevent my right hand from taking over.

Take eating, for example. If I can stab it or grab it, I can probably get it to my mouth left-handed. My trauma doctor said there is actually something referred to as functional use of your elbow, which means you have to be able to bend it enough to get food to your mouth. Oh Lord, let my elbow bend when it gets out of this splint. You see, I can’t imagine eating left-handed the rest of my life.

Have you ever tried eating spaghetti or French-cut green beans with your left hand? Sometimes those squiggly foods are hard enough to keep on a fork with a dominant hand.

“Hold it like a caveman, and it will work normal,” my left-handed brother said of the fork. “Actually, hold it upside down, and try that.”

Huh? I’m pretty sure he is yanking my chain after years of me tormenting him as a leftie.

Can you yank a chain left handed? I intend to find out.